A New Year

Another new year is upon us. Some will go out and celebrate in style at the latest greatest party (New York Times Square) others, like myself, will have a quiet celebration at home.

Actually, truth be told, I can not remember the last time I stayed awake long enough to meet the New Year. Yikes...

Some of us have already thought of or are making their final decisions on their New Year resolutions. Most of us make the "lose weight" or "get finances in order" as goals we would like to accomplish. Me inlcuded. Every year I make about a handful, only to fail at seeing them through before February even hits.

For example, my three 2008 resolutions included: pay off debt, eat healthy (lose weight after birth of son), and take time out for me (a difficult one as most mothers know!) This year, I have decided to make my resolution simple: complete at least one 2008 resolution.

What do you want to accomplish in 2009?

Boy or Girl?

My husband and I agreed right off that we were going to find out the sex of our baby. I remember walking into that cramped ultrasound room; the cool gel being placed on my belly and the anticipation that came afterward while waiting to hear whether this growing baby inside me was going to be a Logan or an Audrey.

I secretly wanted a girl. Perhaps it is because I am the only female out here on this wide, vast ranch. However, when the ultrasound tech self-assuredly said I had a little boy I felt (with shame) disappointment.

Two days ago, my husband asked me if I would trade Logan in for a girl. Without any hesitation I exclaimed "Hell no!"

I unconditionally love my little guy! I look forward to seeing the person he is each day and the person he is becoming. Already he is such a jokster and a little flirt. He gives me kisses when I feel blue or stressed; makes me laugh with his talk and facial expressions.

Now I can not even imagine my life without him!

Survival of the Holidays?

Sometimes, while asking someone how their holidays have went, they answer, "survived another year." With Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas so close together I can see how some may take a survival strategy for those last 3 months of the year.

I ask, when did the holidays have to become a state of survival? What happened to the simplicity of it all? It should be about sharing this time with our loved ones. Instead it has turned into a commercial war. Before Halloween even hits the stores are filled with the newest, greatest toys. Sales are flaunted promising the consumer the best deals and prices, "buy one get one half off."

And we, somewhere along the lines have gotten caught up in it all. Do children even know why we celebrate these glorious days? Parents run around in a frantic trying to purchase that last PSP or video game that little Johnny will die without. Instead of looking forward to having family over, they find it more as a burden-the extra cleaning, cooking, and decorating to prove that yes, your house is better than everyone's on the block for holiday splendor.

I've often said how simple of a life I live out here with my family. A tree cut down from the mountains, a few decorations, "Twas the Night Before Christmas" being read and a CD playing those classic Christmas carols.

We should all take a step back and re-evaluate this time of year. Was the bustle and that PSP worth all the debt and stress?

And so I leave with you today to think about the following excerpt from "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" by Dr. Seuss.

And the Grinch, with his grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow,

Stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?

"It came without ribbons! It came without tags!

"It came without packages, boxes or bags!"

And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!

"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.

"Maybe Christmas...perhaps...means a little bit more!"

Fall

Today is the first day of my favorite season...Fall. I love how the leaves change color, the crisp cool days with the sun shining down on my face. Homemade hot apple cider brewing on the stove, caramel apples, Halloween. What season could be better!?

Ok so I also love the Winter, but not as much as Fall. Every year on the first day of this glorious season, we pack up a blanket and some food, and go out for a picnic. This year, however, we will not be doing this due to all the cow work that has to be done.

Also, we did not grow any pumpkins this year, so I am desperatley searching for a pumpkin patch nearby to pick them.

I hope that even though we did not have our annual Fall picnic on the first day, perhaps we can next month when things calm down a bit.

Happy Fall everyone!!

Losing the Baby Weight

Before I became pregnant, I was a fitness fanatic. Okay, maybe not fanatic. But I ate healthy and worked out regularly. Even during my pregnancy I stayed active and ate correctly, not gaining more than the recommended 28 pounds.

I knew that pregnancy causes your body to change, however, what was failed to be mentioned or read was how difficult it was going to be to get back to my pre-pregnancy size. Half my old shirts won't button over my waist any my old jeans do not go up past my thighs.

Just finding the time to exercise is a challenge; and don't even get me started on the meals (or lack of) that I now find myself consuming.

Example 1: at my 6 week postpartum appointment, my doctor mentioned how thin I was getting, especially in my face. I told her I was on the "new mom diet," I don't eat, I just look at my food.

Example 2: Getting tired of the way I look, I made a goal for yesterday. Drink two bottles of water and take a walk. The result, one bottle of water.

I have decided that what I really need to do is sign up for a marathon 6+ months from now. This will force me to get back on track with my old healthy lifestyle.

Now the question is, what to do with Logan while trying to accomplish all this. I have a jogging stroller and have tried on several occasions to go for a walk here with him. However after passing the first cattle guard (about 10 feet from my front door) he is already fussing and crying.

I love hiking and have always dreamed of a back country backpacking trip through Europe, Alaska, Tibet, wherever. Of course, none of this can be done until Logan is potty trained (packing dirty diapers around is not my idea of a pleasant trip.) However, day to two day hikes can be manageable. In fact we are in the middle of planning a family hiking trip for our wedding anniversary this year.

At least the hiking will get me out on the trail and moving more. Chasing Logan around and walking to the office and back just isn't cutting it.

I know that with a lot of hard work and making the time for better habits, I will eventually fit back into my favorite pair of old jeans. Until then, I will make goals and work at achieving them more and more each day. I will remind myself that this new body, though I hate it, is the result of someone pretty special.

No Rest For the Wicked

I was thinking about this phrase a few days ago. The phrase originated from the book of Isaiah verses 48:22 and 57:20-21.

48:22 "'There is no peace,' says the Lord, 'for the wicked.'"

57:20 "'But the wicked are like the troubled sea, when it cannot rest, whose waters cast up mire and dirt.'"

57:21 "'There is no peace,' saith my God, to the wicked.'"

Basically, this phrase says that the wicked will be tormented. However, we use this phrase for many things these days. In college, my boss used this phrase when I pulled a 9 hour shift with no lunch or breaks.

Others have used it towards me when I was working two jobs, going to college, and planning my wedding. Come to think of it, I have heard this phrase quite a bit.

However, I was thinking of this phrase more in the sense of a Mom or Dad. I certainly feel stretched thin most of the time. For some unknown reason society and/or other family members think that just because you are a Mom (or for some Dads) it is your responsibility to maintain the household, and everything that goes on in it.

It is the Mom's responsibility to take care of everyone in the family, be it cooking, cleaning, taking care of the children, or in my case along with all the mentioned above, also help bring in money to pay bills and try to live a comfortable life. My question is, with Mom taking care of everyone and everything else around, who is taking care of her? I think most people look beyond Mom and her well being and more towards how she is running the world around her.

I joke with my husband that with everything I am expected to take responsibility for, maintain, and do, I will eventually have to be put away into a padded room. Though I say this in a teasing manner, sometimes that padded room looks tempting just to have a break from it all.

This is the life I have been given and I am grateful and appreciative of it. But, would it kill anybody to give Mom just a little break once in a while?

Getting Back on Schedule

I have been so busy these past two weeks that I haven't had much time to write. I decided that I wanted to get everything done in the office. So I made a list of what needed to be done and when I wanted it done by. I only have three things left, assuming of course, that no emergency projects get e-mailed my way.

Cattle are being worked everyday until October; Friday we were given the afternoon off so that we could go to the fair. Basically, it was the only day for the rest of the month that we would have the ability to leave the ranch for a while.

The fair was a nice change of pace. We mainly go to look at the animals and eat fair food. Logan, being as little as he is, was not able to go into Old McDonald's farm, but that is something to look forward to next year.

I had always wished that I was involved in FFA. The thought of raising a pig, goat, lamb, or any other animal and showing it at the fair always intrigued me. A ribbon, I never cared what color, placed upon my animal and/or exhibit...

Though I never did this, Logan has a chance if he wants, and that is something that I can be involved in with him. However, I do not want to be one of those parents who pushes their unsuccessful dreams upon their child. So if this is something he does not want to do, then I will accept it and support whatever it is that he chooses.